Monday, August 12, 2013

"You're getting ready to get shot!"

Oh hey Monday, I. Hate. You.  You know those days when your like, "I'm gonna need super powers to make it through this day."?  Yep, I'm there!
Now that I have established my hate for Monday we will move on.

Somethings shouldn't be blogged about for the protection of pride of the parties involved, but lucky for you, that party wasn't me and it was funny, so I am sharing it.

I would say there is probably a top 10 list of things that you shouldn't say to police officers.  My husband is in corrections, so I know that they don't take well to threats.   But, way up at the top of that list, probably #1, is what my husband yelled at a police officer on Saturday night.

It was a normal Saturday night.  The husband had to work second shift, so I was home alone.  When I am home alone I always set the house alarm if I am going upstairs where I can't hear what is going on downstairs.  I set the alarm like normal, went to run on the treadmill, and came back down and took a shower.  Did you see any steps I forgot? Like disarming the alarm?

Anyways, T got home and set the house alarm off.  We immediately disarmed it and thought nothing of it (we set it off letting the dogs out sometimes).  We went about our normal routine and got ready for bed.

About an hour later, Kayne, our Great Dane, started going bat shit crazy.  I opened the bedroom door to see what he was going crazy about and I see the silhouette of someone with a flashlight at our front door.  Now, let me tell you about our doors.  We have a big doors that are 3/4 frosted glass with iron rod-work in the between the glass, so you can see outside. 
Our front doors from the outside.
I immediately freaked.  I woke my husband up and said that someone was trying to get in the house with a flashlight at the front door (let me say that they were not saying ANYTHING,just fooling with the front door handle and they didn't ring the doorbell).  He immediately shot up and got the gun out of the bedside table. 

Cue what you shouldn't say to police officers.  My husband ran in the living room and cocks the gun (I am thinking for theatrical effect, because it was something straight out of a movie) and yells, "Your getting ready to get fucking shot."  (Sorry for the language, but when you think someone is breaking in your house evidently you have to act big and bad...a simple "who's there" won't suffice). 

This is also the point that police get a little bit aggravated.  And yell, "Sheriff's Department!  Put the gun down!" Let's just stop right there, bhahahahaha.  Okay, moving on.  My husband then opened the door and said he was sorry and explained we thought someone was breaking in.  Evidently our neighbor who is an older woman and lives alone when her husband is on the road called the police.  Bless her heart, she was probably freaking out over there by herself thinking someone was breaking into our house. 

Anyways, all is well that ends well.  I about had a heart attack and T's pride was a little hurt.  I think the police telling him to try asking who is there before threatening to shoot is a good idea.

Tip:  If something like this happens do not start hysterically laughing in bed 30 minutes later and in your best man voice yell, "You're getting ready to get f'in shot!"  Evidently, T didn't appreciate the humor I saw in the situation.

 Oh yeah, somehow this is all my fault because I left the alarm on...I guess it kinda is, but it makes for a funny story.  Maybe T will see the humor today...or 10 years from now?!

P.S. Don't go thinking my husband is some egotistical redneck asshole...You should know I have better taste than that. He is that guy that stops and helps a woman trying to lift her elderly mother out of a van by herself into a seriously he did that earlier this week.  

Evidently this guy makes a pretty good guard dog.  Who knew?

Other than that we had a pretty uneventful weekend since T was working second shift this week.  We started watching Orange is the New Black.  Have you seen that?  I will say, it isn't for everyone because it has language and nudity.

I also managed to fill a cart on Forever 21's website with $500 worth of merchandise.  Please tell me I'm not the only person who fills my cart up online with everything I like and then has to go through a long and painful process of elimination before actually being able to order.

Oh, yeah, we are also in the process of re-purposing a door for a headboard.

Sami's Shenanigans


  1. That is hilarious! And I love how the headboard is coming along!

  2. I'm SO that way with online shopping too. If only we could say "screw it" and order the $500 worth of merchandise. Oooooh to be living THAT dream.... :)

  3. We love orange is the new black! We are about halfway through the series. You also should check out the other Netflix series, house of cards, if you haven't yet. So good!

  4. Love OITNB! Finished the season in a week and now the BF and I have to wait an entire year for season 2!!! I think I'm gonna pick up the book to fill the OITNB void! ;-P

  5. haha! love that story!

    And I can't tell you how many "carts" I've filled full of random things, only to abandon them because I've come to my senses and realize I don't need 2 new pairs of skinny jeans, some new flats, and 4 new cardigans!

  6. LOL I totally do the exact same thing when online shopping.... hilarious! & we had a great dane growing up & I thought he was huge but I'm pretty sure he was 1/2 the size of yours lol! He's a HUGE cutie!!!!
    Monday is 1/4 of the way over! holla!

  7. I DEFINITELY have a full cart on Forever21 right now that I am avoiding going through!
    I feel your pain!

  8. Hahahahahahah Holy shit what a night. That little old lady was looking out for you guys!

    PS: LOVEEEEE your doors.

  9. I am seriously laughing out loud! That sounds exactly like what my husband would say. So funny!

    On a side note that relates, my son has a temporary tattoo on his arm of a police car. He told me that if he got pulled over he would tell them that he was the police.... probably wouldn't go over well either.

  10. LOL! I just laughed so hard...that story was hilarious! I feel your pain with the online shopping as well. so bad!

    LOVE the old door for a headboard!!

  11. oh my gosh, such a fun/crazy story! And my fiance and I just watched the whole entire season of Orange is the New Black over the past few weeks. It's very entertaining, but like you said, it gets kind of uncomfortable at parts. I like it though-- Just wish some parts weren't so graphic!

  12. LOL! I do that all the time... I will fill a cart up with merchandise and then I need to get it down to my price limit. It is very painful and I always land up talking myself into 1 or 2 more items I really shouldn't be buying. I love F21! BTW, I love the wreaths on your doors!

  13. Haha I love that story! I'd probably say something along those lines too. Why would you politely ask who is there when someone is creeping into your door with a flashlight? Umm and I love Orange is the New Black. I just finished it!

  14. I would have died laughing with you. That stuff is funny and has to be shared, whether the other person thinks it's funny or not. I love the wreaths on your doors, and your pup is adorable. Finally, I normally fill up the online shopping carts with the stuff I want just to see how much it would be to just not buy any of it.

  15. That is too funny. I am dying laughing over here. Glad your husband gave a warning shout and didn't just open the door with gun in hand. Too funny.

  16. LOL. I laughed so hard. I love your dog. Sooo cute. :)

  17. I'm so excited to start following your blog. Love the story! My hubs is a cop and I know he would've just died laughing! And then probably have a beer with your hubs! p.s. I LOVE Orange is the New Black!

  18. LOL best story ever. Thank you for brightening my Monday!!!

  19. Haha that story was great, especially because it was actually you that didn't turn off the alarm and you ended up finding the humor in the situation, while he did not. LOL.

  20. I was crying I laughed so hard at this! Glad things were ok :)

  21. Just found your blog. This made me lol. My husband is a DOII and seriously, I happen to think that everyone in Law Enforcement totally thinks they are bad asses lol.
    Orange is the New Black is a good show, if you don't mind the nudity and "lesbian activity" as they say on the show lol

  22. HAHA this had me in hysterics! And Kayne-- too cute! I have a soft spot for Danes. I rescued them for awhile years ago when I got my first, Presley. Funny thing, she "half sat" on the edge of the couch, as it looks like Kayne is doing in the photo.